I realize this might be too late for some of y'all, but for the rest-- for that portion of the reading audience that still has a chance-- let me offer you this advice.
As much as it depends on you, try to have daughters. OK? Because daughters talk to you. And then you'll never find yourself in the position of having to get information about your son from the mother of his girlfriend, because her daughter talks to her.
It starts around age 14. That's when sons realize that as far as acceptable people are concerned, you as a mother are pretty much dog meat. Pond scum. Toad poop.
Oh there's the occasional burst of chatter that may come at you out of left field, but it usually has to do with their homework demands or the NFL draft, their dad's unfairness or their need for new socks. But for the stuff that really matters -- the stuff you care about and want to know about? Like feelings, relationships, hopes and dreams? Zip. Silence. You are Persona Non Grata Numero Uno. Even if -- no, ESPECIALLY if you ask. The audacity! The nerve! The annoyance that is maternal questioning!
And it won't matter a bit that you have not stopped loving them and being interested in their lives and that you feel, well, invested somewhat. Or that you are still expected to wash their boxers and bake them cookies and buy Gatorade and ensure that they never EVER run out of milk. Because heaven help us-- that would be a tragedy of the most extreme level.
It might be gratifying when they receive accolades for their football playing, and it might be handy to have help carrying in the groceries. But if you want someone to let you into their lives?
You gotta go with a girl. Seriously.
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2 comments:
I agree. THat's why I had two! You should have done what I did. Why didn't you? :)
OH boy. Too late. Pray hard.
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