I've lost my mothering mojo.
I have no more mom muscle. I feel like Rodney Dangerfield. I get no respect.
Holding the line is hard work. It takes a lot of determination to be consistently strict. Kids wear you down. They aren't dumb. They know where the weaknesses in your wall are.
I know I did a better job when I only had one kid, or two. Or even three. I wasn't SO shabby at four, but I'm telling you right now--this number five child of mine, while I love her skinny eleven-year-old self with all my heart, is pushing and testing and she is relentless. I don't know if I'm just weary of the whole mom routine, or if I'm just weary in general, but I know she is getting away with stuff that would curl the toes of many a stronger mom. She is young and brave. She has tenacity and motivation. I have stiff knees and flabby resolve. With the other kids I wielded a wooden spoon. Now it's more like a white hankie.
Is it just me? Or is there a reason that birth order stereotypes endure? How many first borns out there can raise their right hand in solidarity and say that the baby of their family got away with murder? What about you youngest kids? Do you think you turned out okay anyway?
I wonder what Michelle Duggar would say about this. How do you keep your authority intact when the kids far outnumber the grown-ups, when you've been saying the same things for 26 years now, and you just don't have the energy to battle anymore? Especially because for me, right now, I have the added responsibility of keeping my mom in line. (Where does she fit in? She's the oldest person, but she acts like the youngest!)
I have to trust that God didn't make a mistake when He placed Susannah in my care. He isn't surprised by my circumstances, and He hasn't abandoned me to raise this child on my own. And as I've counseled so many younger moms.....God has no grandchildren. So I think I need to tell her, "You just wait until I talk to your Father about this." And then do it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Sweet little Suzy causing problems?
I'm guessing she's just trying to figure out where she fits into your life these days.
Remember when each new baby came home from the hospital (except Garrison of course) and the adjustment time needed by the older siblings before everything fit smoothly into a routine?
Sounds to me like the same thing with the difference being that the "baby" is not the youngest and the youngest is no longer the "baby". Very complicated indeed.
I'm praying for your flabby resolve.
I might not even make it through 4 without the white hankie. He's only 4 so I'd better stick with it!
Loved this! I have only two but so, so true. Just entering the "Duuh, knew that Mum" stage with SB1. Clinging with flabby resolve to what remains of my pedestal...Hang in there kiddo. Tillyx
PS Astute comment from Pam
Post a Comment